Emotional Struggles After Cancer Treatment: Seeking Advice

Hi Jenny I had radiation in 2019 currently having chemo for mbc. All those feelings are normal. Anxiety and fear due to the unknown common. The anger of why me. Feeling abandoned because there is less contact with medical as treatment is considered completed. Find things that make you happy and you enjoy. Learn how to relax, cultivate friendships. Do self care. Always consider therapy to learn coping skills and have someone to express your feelings to.

I feel the same and I can’t figure out why I can’t just be happy that I’m through treatment.

Hi Jenny, There are so many emotions that come along with this diagnosed. Please   allow yourself to grieve, however, we are in this together. You can do this and you are not alone. Feel free to continue to reach out. Sharon

So...same. Chemo, surgery, and radiation....then a bit of radio silence. "See you in a few months after your next scan". But, I am also not able to have another doc support me with weight loss or push to hard because I am still recovering from all of the treatments I went through....so....I am focusing on the small moves I can make to get better. I am working on making better choices for me...exercise, food, etc. I would love to know more about how everyone else is dealing with the post treatment transition.

This is when you actually have time to think about what you just went through. It's painful and sad but normal to have different feelings. We go through the grief process with cancer...hugs

Jenny, My Oncologist told me that emotions, outbursts, fears, anxiety… all very normal for patients with cancer and undergoing treatments. Told me that I need to keep active as much as possible and to express my feelings with trusted peers and family. I walk every day and am so thankful that I can, as I live alone, and being outside and in public routinely has been a great emotional benefit for me. I’m recently retired from being an ICU and RN leader, and I love bundling up and walking around the neighborhood talking to others and breathing fresh air. Bless you and your emotions… hang in there… 🙏

Walking is the best,it boosts your mood

Sadly there is alot of loss with cancer...physical loss and change. Loss of relationships because you find out family or friends that were not supportive at all. Loss of income. Loss of things you can no longer do....temporary or permanent.

I was shocked at the lack of support by family that I thought really cared about me. They will be shocked when I die someday because I changed my family trust to reflect the lack of support I got.

Cat, Hang in there. Where others turn to be superficial and non-caring, more will be caring and understanding. No one knows how we feel unless they are in our shoes. I’m a lifelong RN and felt empathy for family and friends but now, impact is so much greater. My mom always said that if you have true friends, you are lucky if they fit into one hand. Both of my parents and one of my five sisters have died of cancer, and I was blessed to be able to care for them, give injections, port care, and apts. I know how you feel but please never lose hope because we are not alone, even though this journey is so difficult. I felt so bad when my sister lost her hair, but now, as I lost mine, I so get it. 🙏🙏🙏

Does anyone have markers done or signatera labs?

Thank you Irene. I have never felt so lonely in my life. My co workers have been amazing and accept me where I am. I even feel their loss.. I was the strong,knowledgeable one before. Now I cannot do as much physically and they can depend on me to do certain tasks.

Cat, After my sister died of aggressive ovarian cancer and my dad died years prior, my first cousin on my dad’s side informed me that BRCA is in our family. My dad’s 2 sisters also died of ovarian, breast cancer and acute leukemia. I was tested because of years of ovarian/uterine concerns and I tested positive for the identical mutation of my first cousin and my aunt, my dad’s sister. I inherited the gene from dad. My mother also died of colon cancer that spread to her 1 remaining ovary, but no genetic problems on mom’s side but still there are breast, colon, bone cancers. I was offered the double mastectomies 9 years ago but didn’t want mutilated without just cause. I had the total hysterectomy and UPMC Magee genetics and hi risk cancer screenings were done biannual and my triple negative cancer was found on my annual MRI and the mammogram 6 months prior was clean. The tumors were very small / tiny and 3 nodes tested negative with my bilateral mastectomies done after the positive biopsy. Unfortunately, chemo and radiation was not recommended at that time because of clean nodes and margins but my follow up Oncologist screening was 3 month testings and my CA 27 29 was elevating. When he felt a small axillary lump, with clean CT scans, a PET was done and my one lymph node was necrotic and aggressively positive with my cancer KI score 95% aggressiveness. That bot my aggressive chemo tx and repeat surgery September 2024 to remove the diseased node that shrunk to nothing with the aggressive doses of chemo. I’m still on chemo, a year, but orally now, Xeloda and soon to start Oliparib. I cannot receive immunotherapy because of autoimmune dx x5. Dr is sending me to evaluate possible radiation, even though nodes negative with chemo because of the aggressiveness. I’m thin and he is not certain of needs but is being cautious because of my clean report with the surgery and node spread a year later, feeling the cancer has been in my blood. I so wish you well. 🙏

Also, aside from sick days that were with Adriamycin chemo, red devil, I aggressively walk 10 miles or more each day, since recently retired from years of nursing. Oncologist highly recommended my aggressive walking, as exercises are beneficial with aggressive cancers. I’m doing my best to keep eating well and staying active. Great for my mind too!

Wow Irene,that's some journey. I can't imagine. I am also a nurse ,over 35 years. I walk alot too. Trying to eat more vegetables. Lots of vitamins.

Join a fb group. I belong to the breast cancer integrative group. Lots of good info and people who know how you feel.

Yes, and i don’t know why? I think knowing that my cancer is gone I feel so lost like how will I ever live my life again

Tiffany, It is hard for me to feel that “all was clean,” as I heard this before and cancer was in my blood, as well, but told this aggression is rare. Lead a healthy life, keeping active and nourished, and my opinion, do whatever Oncologist recommended. My family died quickly but we did not know about BRCA, and when I tested positive, my monitors were more frequent. I’m the only one left with the gene, as my sister died from ovarian and my 4 other sisters tested negative thankfully, for them.

Jenny, I have been all of that. What helped me was to start journaling. In 2007, I started writing my feelings and yelling while writing, and, a little cursing along the way. But then, one day, I started reading what I had written and started laughing at myself. When you get to the point where you can laugh at your situation, you will find healing. Please talk to someone who will listen.. not give advice, but listen. You will be just fine. Praying for you and your strength. 🙏🏾🙏🏾

These complex emotions after completing treatment are incredibly common in the cancer community, and many others have walked this same difficult path. The mix of anxiety, fear, abandonment, and anger often comes from the sudden shift from active treatment to a new normal, along with processing everything that has happened - these feelings are valid and part of the healing journey that extends beyond physical recovery.