Why do I have to stay positive during cancer treatment?

Your feelings are completely valid, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with feeling angry or frustrated during cancer treatment. Many people in this community understand that pressure to maintain positivity when you're going through something so difficult and exhausting. It's perfectly normal and healthy to experience the full range of emotions that come with cancer treatment, including anger, fear, and frustration - these feelings don't make you negative or weak.

Hi Melissa - You have every right to be mad. This is not a "journey" any of us willingly signed up for. Scream as loud as you want. We hear you and all have days where we feel the same. It's terribly unfair and you have every right to grieve. Some days the only thing that helps me keep my head up is the thought that of all my siblings, I am okay with me being the one that got this, if it means less probability for them. I feel the same way about my husband and my son. I would never want this for them, so if anyone was to have to take the hit, I'm okay with it being me.

Hi Laura It's interesting you mentioned your siblings. I too am the only person in my entire family to have any type of cancer! That does make me angry! My team is so gung-ho on the genetic testing but not one time has anyone handed me a questionnaire about career/jobs in my life! I spent over 35 years as a hairstylist practically my entire life and I'm 100% convinced all of the years of chemical exposure contributed to this. Yet no one will ever know! For example -One of the last toxic chemicals I worked with was formaldehyde! It was the primary ingredient in the Brazilian blowout!! But there have been many more! I tend to blame myself because in the late 80's -90's we rarely even wore gloves! Lol I "technically" have the cancer but so does my family! I shield them as much as I can! I never asked any friends or family go to any chemo/doctors appointments... UNLESS I'm not able to drive home then I have too! I figured if I made them go to a gazillion appointments it was just like they had the disease too! I don't want that for anyone!! They get enough exposure from me recovering from surgeries, side effects or just complaining lol Never in a million years did I expect this but I should have! I've been dealing with this awful disease since 2022. They say we are supposed to eventually "accept" this ... however when you look up the definition of "accept" it says: "Consent to receive" lol Well..I do NOT consent to receiveing this crap!!! I appreciate your input! Ty!!

You are free to feel anything you want. No one can tell you what or how to feel. Only you know what it's like for you. Yes we have all been through it but everyone is different. I wish you luck. Enjoy what you can and try not to let the cancer be your life.

Melissa, I 100% know where you are coming from. When you learn that you don't have the gene or a history of breast cancer in your family, it's hard not to go down the path of "how/where did I get this?" OR "why was I the one?" You start traveling down the road and revisiting your life to think through all the choices you made .... Was it my job? My stress level? The lotions and potions I put on my body? The water I drank? The food I ate? I would not wish this on anyone. I'm here for you, girl. Be mad. It's okay. This community helps.

I understand what you’re talking about I feel the same way too. We just have to keep our heads up

I totally agree girl! Anyone who says stay positive never had cancer. There is no wrong way to feel so just own it! I felt exactly like you!

Melissa you are not alone with this question that’s for sure! Slapping on a “happy” face gets exhausting after awhile You are aloud to feel all the feels that go along with this journey. I exhausted myself trying to be “happy”, and trying to be my “old bubbly self” I am now navigating through finding my “new self” and can relate with your statement, Everyone asking you “how you feel?,” I am done explaining to them yes I’m am not in active treatment anymore, yes my scars are healed but my body is screaming my hormones are all over the place, and I’m too exhausted to explain that to them so I now say “I am fine, “today”, but tomorrow’s struggles I might not be “okay” Happy, Mad, Sad, Depressed, Exhausted, Great full, Greif, Fear, etc. is all part of our journey and Surviorship You are allowed to feel anyway you are feeling don’t exhaust yourself trying to help the people around you feel better God Bless 🙏 Stay Strong 💪