Scared about brain MRI showing spots - oncologist disagrees, need spinal tap?

Hi everyone! I got a bad brain MRI scan showing many spots and concerns for LMD, the weird thing is my oncologist doesn’t see it when he looks at my scans, so now I have to do a spinal tap soon to confirm. I so sad, this is a complete nightmare, I just want to stay in bed a cry, I’m trying to calm my anxiety but it’s so hard. I believe in Jesus and the power of prayer. I’m asking God everyday to heal me from this horrible disease.