How Do You Cope After a Cancer Diagnosis?

Reading voraciously about prostate cancer helps. I Google, Grok, and dig into studies reported by the NCBI at the National Institutes of Health. I’ve had a couple of articles published, and share my experience with anyone expressing interest. Given my age (77), I’ve made a sort of peace with it all … sort of. Getting and loading a digital picture frame, which runs all the time, presents the people and experiences in my life. It’s like my life flashing before my eyes. It has amplified my gratitude abundantly. Reconnecting with old friends helps enormously, too. So you know, I’m a T3b,N1, M0 six years from diagnosis with a Gleason 9, PSA 11.5 at diagnosis, yet undetectable PSA today. Grok likes my chances. I got hope.

Thanks for sharing I have no idea what those acronyms mean…Grok?🤷‍♂️ I am a little over 1 year from diagnosis age 67 Gleason 7 with 3+4, decipher score was 0.17 not even sure what that means. My doctors did say my risk is very low but I must admit I still have some mild anxiety and intrusive thoughts. What is T3b etc? Thanks

Charlie, I didn't know much either but conducted a lot of research on my own. Outcomes4me is a great research starter. Your Gleason score is considered low intermediate and your Decifer score is low, my was much higher. As for dealing with anxiety, yeah, some family and friends len their ears but offer very little due to their lack of knowledge rather than interest. I educate my family and friends and they seem more engaged as if they on my journey as well. That helps me. Plus I speak with a professional as well, read scripture, books, the gym, and outside activities. In other words, I live life to its fullest as long as I can. All that being said, thoughts never really go away, it's about how to manage them. Best wishes moving forward.

Thank you. I relate to most of what you share.

Grok is an artificial intelligence application, a large language model that understands spoken and written language, consumes a large volume of online information, and provides answers, sometimes what doctors don’t know or unwilling to convey. T3b is an indicator of prostate cancer’s stage. In this case, the cancer is in both lobes of the prostate and has spread outside the organ, but not yet to the bones, usually the pelvis and lower spine. It is considered regionally advanced. The N1 means it has spread to one lymph node, and the M0 means it has Not spread to distant organs (ie liver, lungs or brain).

I am in the process of radiation treatment. For me the diagnostic process was stressful and accompanied by anxiety. Once I had a treatment plan anxiety was reduced. I had a role, my stuff to do - mostly exercise. During treatments I do a visualizations and breath work. I’ve been back / visualized on every sierra back pack trip and Yosemite climb from my youth. The combination of exercise, breath work and visualization might be similar to your exercise and mediation.

Oh and a media shift; Apple music is way up and cable news is way down.

Hi Charlie I keep my self busy ,do what drs recommend I have been in treatment. 14 yrs done radiation twice ,chemo,many pills currently pluvicto good luck dion

Dioncio, please share your experience with Pluvicto… side effects, PSAs, etc.

Hi Charlie pluvicto seems to have lowered my psa from 75 to 17 I have 2 more treatments ,lucky iv had no side effects I do get tired in evening,my psa at one point was 225,but anxious to see how much lover after next treatment. Try stay positive I think it's very important

DT -Thank you for sharing. How are you doing in between your ears? I mean thoughts emotions etc. I am 67 years. You? Hang in there buddy

Hi Charlie, I'm 63 years old, 64 next month, and I've opted not to have the surgery. I still have no symptoms right now. And they've been monitoring since 2018. My PSA is now 20.5. My doctor wasn't very informative. I assume my monitoring has now stopped. He hasn't really said that, but I don't have an appointment. It's a very confusing time, but I'm just living. I'm just living my life. I have no children and my siblings live out of state. One day at a time. I like to hear your thoughts. Thank you, Jeff 

Hey Jeff, sorry to hear about your journey thus far. My humble advice would be to seek a second or third option from both a Urology Surgeon, a Radiation Oncologist, and a General Oncologist. That PSA number is extremely high in my experience and research, thus needs more than monitoring at this point. Still, live your life the way you want to with many more years ahead. GS

Hi Jeff To start with have you had an MRI and a biopsy done of the prostate? The PSA level alone is just one piece of information and although being symptom free is encouraging so was I and I’m glad I did the investigation of what was going on even though my PSA was only 4.5. Just my 2 cents and I wish you well.

I agree with Gerry above.

Search for a local prostate support group. I wasn’t expecting reluctant at first but there is a tremendous amount of knowledge and experience in my group. It has been very helpful in navigating the various treatment options, symptoms and having a venue to ask questions and discuss.

Charlie good morning I'm on pluvicto 1 more injection then not sure what's in store iv been in treatment for 14 years first radiation ,then lots pills flutimde extandi currently orgovyx done chemo,I keep active with clubs travel ,stay positive sure helps iv brought my psa to 19 from 225 good luck charlie

Hi Jeff My thoughts are very direct - find another urologist or radiation oncologist and develop a comprehensive treatment plan. Just because you are symptoms free (I was) doesn’t mean the PC isn’t active, need I say more? Do all the correct diagnostic protocols active monitoring in my mind is insufficient. Thanks and feel free to circle back Charlie

I do NOT recommend a support group. Their cases are NOT your case. You will be surrounded by misery, complaining, blaming doctors etc. Very very little positivity. One of my doctors actually recommended NOT going to these meetings and I’m in complete agreement with him. Focus on your health and your case alone in my view is the optimal approach. Thanks

Charlie K, your experience with support groups is not my experience. Like cancer every support group cannot be put into one basket. Curious that your on this site which is a support group is it not? I think this is not a group for me. I wish everyone luck with your journey.

Support groups vary a lot. I participated in a face to face support group for ALS caregivers. Support group was awesome. Even though ALS varies a lot between patients the emotional and social side have a lot in common between different Patients/caregivers.

T-3 MRI first of all....if it sees something then guided biopsy...and see the results. Then lay out a treatment plan. I would get on it though....no need to delay.

Thank you for sharing these thoughtful coping strategies and opening up this important conversation. The combination of meditation, physical activity, journaling, and professional support shows a well-rounded approach to managing the emotional challenges that come with a cancer diagnosis. Many community members find that friends and family, while well-meaning, often struggle to know how to respond, which can feel isolating during an already difficult time. Your willingness to reach out here creates space for others to share their own experiences and discover new ways to cope with anxiety and worry during treatment and beyond.