How do I tell my family about a terminal cancer prognosis?

Sharing difficult news with loved ones is one of the hardest parts of a cancer journey, especially when processing grief and navigating updated prognosis information. Many in this community have found that having honest conversations with family, even when painful, can actually bring people closer together and help everyone make the most of precious time - though the timing and approach is deeply personal and there's no single right way to handle these conversations.

You make sense AI, I am going to talk to them as soon as possible. This just sucks and hurts everyone. I have to do it and be strong. It’s all going to be over the phone due to their locations which it doesn’t make it any better. I wish I had someone to hold. I’m pretty much dying by myself. I want my wife back!

Michael—You cry easily? Of course, if you’ve had ADT. I cry easily and my prognosis isn’t near as dire as yours (mine is 85% probability I’m dead by 2033). On informing family, I want to go opposite of the soporific pablum of Community AI, which a machine could generate. … Oh, right: A machine DID generate. All but one of my immediate family has or will die of cancer, so I have experience with choices re: sharing the news. I favor (and will do) announcing when sickness is apparent to others. Because 1. No reason to extend their time of distress and 2. No reason for you to hear the requisite false platitudes such as “oh, you’ll beat it; you’re a fighter,” and “just pray; God knows you’re needed in this world.” But think it over and go with YOUR right way, which may not be mine or AI.

Hi Dave. My original prognosis was to go through hell with 6 rounds of chemotherapy that I completed and radiation for 28 days and I would get 5-10 years of life and I was on the down low with my family and like you not tell them. Due to the 1 year prognosis with the ability to spend time with my family visiting / going on a trip within a few months I’m feeling it’s about as short of notice I can give. The 2nd year is going to be pain management and death. I felt the need to let them know after thinking about it. The false platitudes has always driven me crazy and I politely kept my mouth shut. With my new update nobody has bothered me with those fake words of wisdom. I’m kinda glad I changed my mind about letting my kids know. My wife passed 3 months prior to my diagnosis so she has left me with my 3 adult children and we are planning a cruise and a second trip to an all inclusive resort. I should be able to be at peace after that. I was in shock when I first asked for help I was told last Thursday the two year prognosis. I’m still trying to wrap my head around it.

Michael — Thanks so much for impressing upon me the short time window you face, which I initially failed to appreciate. Upon your straightening me out, I’d have to say you’re handling it all as best as anyone could. Are you at all familiar with the financial commentator Jonathan Clements? [“Jonathan Clements (2 January 1963 – 21 September 2025) was a British financial journalist, author and blogger best known as a personal finance columnist at The Wall Street Journal.”] I followed his writing for decades, most importantly after he received a diagnosis similar to yours. He wrote about it fully and frankly right up to his final months. You may want to Google him. I don’t know that his writing is free of a paywall, but articles ABOUT him are available. I mention this only because I doubt someone in my position can be of any help or comfort to you, but Jonathan just might. — Best to you, Dave Stauffer, Denver CO

Thank you Dave S . I’m dealing ok with a lot of tears. My help is in my heart and thoughts. I did a big list of ( Things I Need to Wrap My Head Around ) from the death of my wife 03-1925 too now. 3 months later with a crazy cancer diagnosis . It’s crazy because they are saying now I’m going to dye in actual 2.5 years. I’m a dork! How many of us are in this position. I love you 😘

I understand your pain I'm at the end of my journey too but they haven't experimental drug that's coming out and I have to go tomarrow to see if I going to do chemotherapy again which I do not want to do or the experimental drugs

George V How do I say this but if you feel the price is worth the pain. I went through 6 rounds of chemotherapy thinking I was going to get 5-10 years of life and then radiation. But I’m not. You know my story. Between losing my wife March 19 2025 and 3 months later diagnosed and January 29 2026 after all the treatment they said my cancer is aggressive and that I have 1 year to spend with my family and the 2nd year is going to be pain management and death. I really hope you have a better outcome than me and most do. I wish you well. Life’s tough!

yeah mine cancer is aggressive also