How do you cope when breast cancer spreads and you feel alone?

I'm sorry for all you are going through- my spouse of 28 years acts the same and I feel completely overwhelmed and lost too. Talking and venting it out does help a little. That's all I got. Umm this is a struggle and I'm just trying to keep my shit together as long as possible. I wish you all the very best. Focus on you as best you can and keep hanging on

Good afternoon, Amanda. I was diagnosed with CRC this past October, had a localized mass removed along with several lymph nodes, and am currently in chemotherapy. I'm kinda in a similar situation. My son, who is my primary care person, is very attentive concerning my treatment and knows what's going on but leaves ma alone for the most part. This recovery is a personal journey and I'm guessing your husband is doing the same. I know he's here when needed and am trying to work through this. You could probably say the same. Stay strong. This sucks... I know.

Feeling overwhelmed and isolated during cancer treatment is incredibly common, and those emotions are completely valid given everything happening right now. Many couples struggle to communicate about cancer because partners often process fear and stress differently - sometimes what looks like checking out is actually someone feeling helpless and not knowing how to help. Since loneliness is weighing heavily on you right now, please scroll down the page from the Home Screen of the app to find the Ask Outcomes4Me box to get in touch for a more personal conversation and connect with our clinical care experts. If you're having thoughts of self-harm, please reach out to the crisis hotline at 988.

Hi Amanda. Hope your relationship situation has improved. I find that when you are not well that's when you see the real changes in people. My attitude dealing with such is to focus every way on myself in order to be less stressed and maintain my sanity. Just realize that if we are stressed too much during treatment , we will miss glorious days and likely go leaving behind persons to enjoy life. Take time to focus on you and enjoy the holiday. 💕.

“The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” Psalm 34:18 This verse reminds us that God does not distance Himself from pain. Instead, He draws nearer when hearts are hurting. Brokenness does not push God away—it invites His presence. When strength feels gone and words fall short, His nearness becomes our refuge. If your heart feels heavy tonight, take comfort in this: God is not watching from afar. He is with you, holding what feels shattered, breathing hope where there is sorrow. God be with you all. This life is very temporary, eternity is forever. Just ask Jesus ( if you haven't yet) to come into your life and be Lord of your life. He is just a prayer away. God sends us trials to bring us closer to him. Just focus on spending eternity with our Lord and Savior. He will wipe every tear away. My heart goes out to you all. Good night.

I feel you on this I've been there in the same situation an its like a blast to the emotions traumatized times the unknown keep your head up because this too will pass an as I am now im single though because of insecurities unloved unpretty my mind swarms with overload of what ifs pray because this is no joke because I went for another petscan an the doc said no evidence of tumor now I said did it just disappear because I dont trust easily noone he said its a rare rare case nope it was a miracle an sometimes its hard to have relationships because we go through so much emotions un less someone has been through it theirselves or family they will never know an we suffer in silence alot of times not knowing an sadness despair an the future we think do we even have one it seems like its a death sentence to our life an relationships in a whole I have stage three cervical cancer into stomach an lymph nodes an now im not cancer free but theirs remission for time being after so many radiations an chemos clinical trials are great I did brachy therapy an it worked wonders I hope my words can be of some comfort I love to talk to people give my testimony an my cancer story ❤️

Thank you for sharing sister

Commenting about my experience with a woman that lived with me most of the time over 33 years,she got breast cancer,she had one of her breasts removed,I didn't go to doctors or hospital with her,she didn't ask me to,when she came home she was smoking as usually I said she should stop,shut up I'm not quitting,I started to feel sorry for her shut up I'm ok,her daughter not mine came and stayed with her for a couple weeks,I talked with Sarah daily,she seemed ok,one night she was yelling my name I went in her room she wanted me to help her stand up her daughter took her to the bathroom,next morning I said see you later went to work,that day she was taken to the hospital,she passed away that day,that was 2019,I felt guilty for not being more involved with her Dr visits and treatments,I didn't think of it for some reason,I realized it too late may happen to other men.i now have multiple myaloma and am under treatment,immunotherapy,I see what others on chemo are going thru,consider myself lucky,I'm 73 Sarah passed in 2019 at 69 I miss her,if your husband or partner seems distant to you they may not realize it,ask them questions,explain what your going thru your scared and need their help

I found out I was Stage 4 Lobular Breast Ca with lymph nodes on Rt side, Bone & Uterus lining Feb/ March this year. Developed Liver Mets this November. The shock is the worst part and men do deal with these things different. My hubby attends every appointment and relies on me to communicate the issues with the oncology team. Interestingly our GP (UK) arranged an appointment for us both in the early days after diagnosis to chat with both of us together in an effort to be a conduit so that we could express how we were dealing with this as individuals, partners and a family. We also talked about random things as well. I will be forever grateful to him for this as he gave us hope as well as understanding. What I’m saying is depending where you are get some counselling. It’s crucial to get into a good place mentally and to be equipped with the skills to cope with the many ups and downs in your health journey. Anger is okay as a short phase but it will eat you up and mess with your body in the long run. You will have days that all you want to do is nothing. You will rage and cry. But then will come realisation that if you want to live you need to change your mind to a positive outlook. Some things to occupy your mind when you are ready and which I have found to help. Do your research into Cancer and use all the tools at your disposal. Combine integrative medicine with conventional. Whatever faith you follow look into methods of healing. You are stronger than you think. And as the quote by Napoleon Hill says “Whatever the mind can conceive and can believe, it will achieve” Very best wishes and luck from me to you xx

Thank you all. I love my husband and I’m just so emotional nothing he does is what I need. I’m terrified and I appreciate all of your support and stories. Merry Christmas!

Sorry about your situation, it sounds like he might not know what to do or how to handle the situation as that is very common but I do hope he comes around and gives you the support you need at this tine... fortunately I have a wonderful support system so far but my wife understands that my cancer is terminal and there is no amount of treatments that will change that I am just living life 1 day at a time and sometimes that's all we can do. Stay positive it's the best treatment we can give ourselves...

Hi! Amanda, everyone processes cancer differently, only those that have been diagnosed truly know what are going through. I have found that my circle has gotten smaller and my perspective has changed but I see it as growth. Focusing on yourself and your needs is not selfish, it is necessary. Journaling and groups like this one where you can share your journey or vent when needed is crucial to your mental health. Speaking to social workers is also helpful. There is a book that I highly recommend “through the storm” by Ellie Urban Good luck, Happy new year! “Don’t Let The Bad Days Win!” “