How to support my partner with cancer

Hi G, my recommendation is exactly what you said...learn as much as you can about her cancer in order to be able to discuss options together as a team. Also try to attend as many medical appointments with her as possible. Support is huge in this journey. Wishing you both the best.

Hey G, I don't think I could have said it better than Gerry. A patient being told that they have cancer is a lot to process and having a partner with them is vital. The cancer patient will not remember half of what they are told, especially in the beginning. The partner can be the stability to help the patient weather the storm. I am sending you positive energy and strength to get you both through this troubled time!

Hi everyone, I was diagnosed with multiple myeloma in the spring of 2023 I underwent chemo for 1 year, which didn't help much. So, my team and I decided to schedule a stem cell transplant, ' to be honest, I would NEVER repeat that process again, it knocked the crap out of me ' To my surprise, the outcome of the transplant was a success, to the point where there would be no more chemo, just minimal oral medication to maintain positive results I thank God, and my wonderful team of doctors and nurses for their efforts God Bless them God Bless everyone 🙏

Great news Andy. Happy 4th of July and many more to come. God bless.

Hi G, What I can tell you is to listen when she tells you she's feeling a certain kind of way. Whether that's physically, emotionally, or mentally. At times, there may be nothing you can do, and it may indeed drive you crazy. But know that just by being by her side as much as possible, it will be a comfort to her. Don't forget she will have a medical team. Use them, too. They have resources. Someone said she would not remember everything they told her, and that is 100% correct. Take notes and document things. Depending on her treatment, she may lose her hair. If she gets chemo, she can try cold capping. It's a dry ice type of cap to wear to assist with possibly not losing her hair. It doesn't work for all. Eyebrows and eylashes may go, too. Eyebrows she can color or pencil in. To avoid peripheral neuropathy on hands and feet, she can also wear feet and hand coverings, like gloves that have ice to help. No one told me anything, and I wish I had known. She may also, at times, snap at you because we do that to the person who is with us the most. But don't take it personally. Do take breaks for your own mental health. Hopefully, you have others who will also help. All of it is extremely difficult. I know my family definitely went through a lot as well as I did. Foods may just suck for her, as in all of it may taste nasty and no appetite. Have her try everything so she can get nutrition. I never drank gatorade until I got cancer. Then the grape one became my friend. Hydration is key. I also hated water, so I bought anything to put flavor in it. I used Nuun tablets and hydration packets. You may see her go through a lot. But also, she may do amazing. It all depends on the treatment. Regardless, it's a lot for everyone. Best of luck, and feel free to reach out. I hope this is not overwhelming, but I wish someone had told me all of this stuff when I got diagnosed.

Andy Laz: Can I ask your age? I was diagnosed with CMML ( leukemia) and told I would need a stem cell transplant but the chance of survival was 40-50% ( I am 73) and 50% chance of returning within a year. Also , I would need to hire a 24/7 caregiver after 5 weeks in hospital. They told me it would be very difficult. So I chose not to do it. You said you would never repeat process but you were successful. Did u have a caregiver or did u have to hire one?

Supporting a partner through cancer is incredibly challenging, and it's completely normal to feel overwhelmed while trying to stay strong for them. Consider connecting with other caregivers in cancer support groups who understand this journey, and remember that taking care of your own emotional needs isn't selfish - it actually helps you be a better support system for your partner.