How do I cope with stage 4 sarcoma recurrence and grief?

Hi, I'm Sarah, I'm a 19 year old trans woman. I was diagnosed with stage 4 epetheliod soft tissue sarcoma in May of 2025, after living with a growing tumor in my right arm for over 7 months at that time. In December I was diagnosed again after a major surgery to remove the cancer, I went through radiation to try and limit chances of it coming back, it did though. I was diagnosed with stage 4 for the second time in December after winning the first battle. My dad was originally diagnosed the same week I was, he lost his battle about a month ago now and with that I feel like I lost the person who truly understood what I'm going through and supported me the most in my battle. I know I'm in the less than 1% of people with this type of sarcoma. Which sucks to know as sar oma is already less than 1% of all adult cancers. After all my own research I can't find a single case of someone with my condition living to make it 5 years after initial diagnosis. That's the most devastating news of all of this and watching my mom have to suffer with knowing what my dad went through and what I'm currently going through. Anyway, thank you for reading, I'm just trying to find like-minded people who understand.